226 Church Excuses
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The Store |
I feel lucky >
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But I just went to church last Sunday! |
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I'm sorry I'm late, my son thought it would be funny to siphon my gas. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, my son thought it would be funny to let the air out of my tires. |
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I'm won't be able to make it, I accidentally left my car keys in the pants I sent to the cleaners. |
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I won't be able to make it, someone kicked me in the groin and I'm in a lot of pain! |
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I won't be able to make it, I fell out of a tree trying to rescue an adorable kitten. |
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I won't be able to make it, I fell off a ladder and twisted my ankle. |
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I can't come to work -- I'm having a Lady Gaga moment. |
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I won't be able to make it, someone stole my clothes from the laundromat! |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I had to fix my leaky bathroom pipes. |
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I won't be able to make it, I have leprosy. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I had to call the police to remove a creepy man lingering outside of my house. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I couldn't find the building! |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I forgot where I parked my car. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, it took forever to find my contacts. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, it took forever to find my glasses. |
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I won't be able to make it, I lost my toothbrush and I had garlic for breakfast. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, it took forever to find my wallet. |
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I'm not coming to church, last time I farted really loudly and I'm too embarrassed to go back. |
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I'm not coming to church, I listen to Marilyn Manson. |
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I have other, as-yet-unspecified plans I'm sure will materialize in due time. |
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I'm not coming to church as long as someone like Mel Gibson can call himself a Christian. |
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I'm not coming, I hate people. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I missed the bus. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I missed my flight. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I missed the train. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I got lost in the fog and missed the turn. |
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I won't be able to make it, there's mold growing around my house and it's making me sick. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I ran out of coffee this morning. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I got caught up in the morning news. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I was mugged on my way here! |
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My mugshot has an appointment with the morning news. You'll understand when you see. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I just moved here and I'm still unfamiliar with the area. |
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I won't be able to make it, I have to camp out to get the new game! |
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I won't be able to make it, I have to camp out to get tickets to the new movie! |
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I won't be able to make it, I think my new piercing is infected. |
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I won't be able to make it, my new tattoo needs time to heal. |
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I'll go to church in my next life. |
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I'm sorry I was absent yesterday, I don't want to talk about it. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I had to trim my nose and ear hair. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I have OCD and I cannot leave until the time is an even multiple of 7. |
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I'm sorry I'm late. Once you're as old as I am, you'll understand. |
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Damn. I have a scheduling conflict with my oompah band. |
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I'm sorry I missed church, I was out fishing. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I had to get gas in the car. |
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I won't be able to make it, I just had a panic attack. |
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I won't be able to make it, my good pants shrunk in the wash! |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I'm terrible at parallel parking. |
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I'm sorry I was absent yesterday, I couldn't find parking. |
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I won't be able to make it, I was out all night partying. |
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1 2 3 4 5 | Follow On Twitter |
The Store |
I feel lucky >
What's your excuse?
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