358 School Excuses
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My dog mistook my homework for a newspaper. |
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I didn't feel motivated to do this assignment because you didn't challenge me enough. |
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My friend dared me to skip my homework for an entire month. |
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My dad packed my homework in his briefcase by accident. |
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Homework? What homework? |
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I won't be able to make it, my horse bit me hard. |
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I won't be able to make it, I spilled hot coffee in my lap this morning. |
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My maid accidentally threw my homework away. |
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My furnace went out, so I had to burn my textbooks for the heat. |
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We ran out of toilet paper, so I had to make do with my homework. |
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I'm sorry I've been absent, I've been in jail on false charges and I just got acquitted. |
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Your repetitive assignments insult my intelligence, I am offended you expect us to complete them. |
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Why am I staying home today? Well, this way I can surf Internet porn without offending anyone. |
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I did do my homework, but the only pen I could find had invisible ink. |
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Sorry I was late, I have an iPhone and the Alarm doesn't go off until tomorrow. |
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My excuses work only if you have AT&T. |
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Sorry I'm late. My jedi master made me stay late after practice and pick up the lightsabers. |
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I won't be able to make it, I'm busy preparing for Jesus' imminent return. |
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I won't be able to make it, someone kicked me in the groin and I'm in a lot of pain! |
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I'm sorry I've been absent, I was kidnapped and I just escaped! |
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I won't be able to make it, I fell out of a tree trying to rescue an adorable kitten. |
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I won't be able to make it, I fell off a ladder and twisted my ankle. |
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My dog ate my laptop. |
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I'm sorry I fell asleep, my neighbors kept me up all night with their loud music. |
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I'm sorry I fell asleep, I stayed up all night studying! |
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I won't be able to make it, someone stole my clothes from the laundromat! |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I had to fix my leaky bathroom pipes. |
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I must've left my homework in the bus. |
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I must've left my homework in the car. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I was busy looking for a left-handed monkey wrench for my Boy Scout leader. |
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I won't be able to make it, I have leprosy. |
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I promised myself I wouldn't do anything until my orc reaches level 86! |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I had to call the police to remove a creepy man lingering outside of my house. |
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I fell into the lion cage at the zoo yesterday and I need today off to get stitches. |
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My baby brother tore up my homework. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I got locked out of my house this morning. |
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I did my homework, I just can't open my locker to get it out! |
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I lost my backpack with my homework in it. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I couldn't find the building! |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I forgot where I parked my car. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, it took forever to find my contacts. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, it took forever to find my glasses. |
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I won't be able to make it, I lost my toothbrush and I had garlic for breakfast. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I couldn't find the room! |
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I can't make it, I lost my wallet and I have to spend today at the DMV getting a new license. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, it took forever to find my wallet. |
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I don't have enough willpower to finish my homework on time, so why bother? |
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I think I've got lumbago. It feels just like a hangover, oddly enough. |
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I'm sorry I fell asleep in class, my mattress at home is lumpy and I toss and turn all night. |
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I have other, as-yet-unspecified plans I'm sure will materialize in due time. |
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1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 | Follow On Twitter |
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