231 Events Excuses
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The Store |
I feel lucky >
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I'm sorry I'm late, an old friend just stopped by and I had to make him feel at home! |
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Damn. I have a scheduling conflict with my oompah band. |
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I'm sorry, I have an operation scheduled then. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I had to get gas in the car. |
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I won't be able to make it, I have to work late tonight. |
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Oh, you meant Pacific Standard Time? |
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I won't be able to make it, I just had a panic attack. |
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I won't be able to make it, my good pants shrunk in the wash! |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I'm terrible at parallel parking. |
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I'm in the parking lot, but that's as far as I'll go! |
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I'm sorry I was absent yesterday, I couldn't find parking. |
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I won't be able to make it, I was out all night partying. |
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I'm not coming to your holiday party, you have pathetic decorations. |
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I won't be able to make it, I'm having period cramps. |
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I'm sorry, I'm pet sitting for a friend that day. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I was playing online poker and my hand was too good to fold! |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I popped a tire on my way here. |
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I can't take time off for that, my potted plant needs constant supervision. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, someone plastic-wrapped my car. |
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Thanks for the invitation, but I'll be praying on Christmas, not partying. |
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I won't be able to make it, I pulled my back last night. |
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I won't be able to make it, there's rain, sleet, and snow outside, and I'm no postman. |
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I won't be able to make it, I'm feeling a little dizzy from fasting for Ramadan. |
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I have a rash. Even there? ESPECIALLY there. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I hit every red light on my way here! |
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Sorry I'm late, but time is a relative, subjective phenomenon anyway, so let's not make a big deal. |
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Everyone tells me I should take more risks, so I tried skydiving and I broke my leg. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I ran over a squirrel and I had to make sure it was okay. |
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Uh, I hope YOU didn't eat the salmon mousse too! |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I was stopped in the street by Sasha Baron Cohen on my way here. |
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But today is my day off, I want to enjoy it! |
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I'm sorry, I have class that night. |
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I could tell you why I was absent, but then I'd have to kill you. |
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I could tell you why I'm late, but then I'd have to kill you. |
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I won't be able to make it today, I just had a seizure and I need to rest for a while. |
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I won't be able to make it, I just ate shellfish and I think I'm allergic. |
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I won't be able to make it, my good shirt shrunk in the wash! |
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I won't be able to make it, I have to clean my shower grout. |
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I won't be able to make it, I'm having bad side effects from my new medicine. |
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I won't be able to make it, a skunk sprayed me as I was walking to my car. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I was stuck behind a slow driver the whole way here. |
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There's a rattlesnake hiding in my lawn, and I'm afraid it'll bite me if I leave for my car. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, my car got snowed in. |
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I won't be able to make it, I'm snowed in to my house. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I got something in my eye on the way here. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I got caught in a gash in the space-time continuum. |
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Your email got filtered into my spam folder by mistake. |
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Someone must have put something in my drink last night, I've been groggy and nauseous this morning. |
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I'm sorry I've been absent, I had my kidneys stolen and sold on the black market. |
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You'll never believe me, but my tardiness involves a bottle of Stoli and a defective Thighmaster. |
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1 2 3 4 5 | Follow On Twitter |
The Store |
I feel lucky >
What's your excuse?
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