61 Sex Excuses
1 2 Follow On Twitter |
The Store |
I feel lucky >
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I'm sorry, it's against my religion to have sex while I'm married. |
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I'm not interested in sex, I'm asexual like Morrissey. |
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We can't have sex, not after that argument you started today! |
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We can't have sex, it's not your birthday yet. |
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I'm sorry, but I don't have sex with uncircumcised men. |
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I won't have sex until you come with me to couple's therapy. |
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I'm sorry, but my dildo pleasures me so much better than you do. |
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Let's not have sex, I don't want to hurt you again. |
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I was drunk when I said I'd go out with you. |
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We can't have sex, I need to get up early tomorrow. |
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I have erectile dysfunction, and I'm out of Viagra. |
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I'm too frunk to duck. |
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I'd love to have sex, as long as you're fine with my furry fetish. |
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You were great in bed, but I can't stand you the rest of the time. |
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I don't want to have sex, I haven't shaved in a while. |
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I already have a headache. |
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We can't have sex tonight, my friend just texted me for help. |
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I won't have sex until you finish my honey-do list. |
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If you were the last person on Earth, I'd date trees. |
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We can't have sex now that we're married, we're family now. |
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I don't want to have sex, I'm into someone else. |
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It's not you...it's me not that into you... |
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I just want to be friends. |
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I don't want to have sex, I just washed the sheets! |
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But we just had sex LAST month! |
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We can't have sex, I'm allergic to latex condoms. |
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I don't want to have sex, I've already masturbated today. |
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We can't have sex, my room has been bugged and I don't want them watching us. |
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We can't have sex, I have some sort of mysterious discharge. |
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You want to have sex? NO. |
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We can't have sex tonight, Tuesdays are statistically the worst day for it. |
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I'm sorry, but I'm not drunk enough to have sex with you. |
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I'm sorry, I'm just not in the mood for sex. |
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I'm sorry, I'm just not ready for sex. |
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I wasn't having sex with her, she was giving me a nude massage. |
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We can't have sex, I'm off the pill. |
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We can't have sex tonight, I'm on my period. |
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My excuses work only if you have an iPhone. |
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We can't have sex, I'm not ovulating yet! |
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I'd rather watch the paint dry. |
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We can't have sex, my parents are staying over tonight. |
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I don't want to have sex, I'd rather watch porn. |
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I don't want to have sex, I'm too pre-occupied with work right now. |
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The prosthetic penis in my bag isn't mine. |
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I have better things to do, like rearrange my white socks. |
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I'd love to have sex, as long as you're interested in S&M. |
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I'm sorry, I had sex on ecstasy and after that experience nothing else can compare. |
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Sorry for sleeping with your sister, your mom wasn't available. |
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Sorry, I'm holding out for someone that doesn't look like Shrek. |
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We can't have sex, I think I'm going to be sick. |
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1 2 Follow On Twitter |
The Store |
I feel lucky >
What's your excuse?
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