147 Late Excuses
1 2 3 | Follow On Twitter |
The Store |
I feel lucky >
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Sorry I was late, I was having a bad acid flashback. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I had high explosives in my bag and airport security interrogated me for hours. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I'm from Alaska so I still follow Alaskan time. |
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I'm sorry I've been absent, I was abducted by aliens. |
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I was abducted by aliens. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I got punked by Ashton Kutcher. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I just got back from Chicago. |
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I don't know. I felt like it. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, someone stole my bike. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I had to get rid of the body in my trunk. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, someone broke into my house and I had to file a police report. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, my alarm clock broke. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I was pulled over for a broken headlight on my way here. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, the bus got delayed today. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, my favorite breakfast restaurant sure was busy today! |
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I'm sorry I'm late, my car broke down on my way here. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I got pulled over for driving alone in the carpool lane. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I just have a bad case of the Mondays. |
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Sorry I can't make it, I'm trapped in a Chilean Mine. |
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I'm dressed up as a Chilean Miner for Halloween, so I won't be in for three months. |
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I didn't hear the bell. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I have a phobia of clocks and other assorted timepieces. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, my toilet was clogged. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, Starbucks had a long wait. |
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My homework was late because my computer caught fire. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I've been constipated. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, it took forever to find my good blouse. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, it took forever to find my good dress. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, it took forever to find my good pants. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, it took forever to find my good shirt. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, a creepy old man followed me onto the bus and it took forever to lose him. |
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I'm not late, I'm observing Daylight Savings Time early. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, my battery died last night and I had to jumpstart my car. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, my battery died on my way here and I had to call a tow truck. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, a deer jumped in front of my car and I swerved off the road. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, my usual route was closed for maintenance and I got lost finding my way here. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, my daughter gave me a hard time getting her ready for school. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, my son gave me a hard time getting him ready for school. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, my dog crapped in my shoe. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, my dog ate my daughter's homework and I had to rush him to the vet. |
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I'm sorry I'm late. My dog ate my bong. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, my dog ate my son's homework and I had to rush him to the vet. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, my dog likes to hide my car keys. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, my dog ran out the front door as I was leaving and I had to catch him! |
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If you don't ask why I'm late, I won't tell. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, I was trapped by a Jehovah's Witness at my door. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, there was a Mormon at my door who just wouldn't leave. |
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I'm sorry I'm late, there was a salesman at my door who just wouldn't leave. |
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I was detained by the police. The dream police. They beat me mercilessly with their snooze bar. |
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I should be drunk enough by noon to be motivated to come in today. |
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1 2 3 | Follow On Twitter |
The Store |
I feel lucky >
What's your excuse?
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